★ application

[twintail]

Applicant Info

◎ Name: Doc
◎ Journal: lilim
◎ Contact: recarm

Character Info

◎ Character's Name: Michiru Matsushima
◎ Character's Canon: Grisaia no Kajitsu
◎ Character's Age: Around 15 or 16
◎ Canon Point: End of the Common Route
◎ Background/History: link
◎ Is the character a hacker and/or do they have a sixth-sense? Nope!

◎ Personality:

Cheerful and idiotic; the fake tsundere girl who always gets overworked about everything under the sun. That's Michiru to people. Though claiming to hail from the land of Tsunderes, Michiru is just a shoddy tsundere imitator who knows very little about what she preaches about. She's energetic, certainly, but every time she speaks, some wires tend to get crossed in that bleached blond head of hers. One could say her head is just running too fast for her to keep up, since she gets scatterbrained very easily. In one instance, she forgot her swimsuit so she rushed to change. But scared about being left behind, she came back at top speed, forgetting her street clothes which were supposed to go on top. Though she acts stubborn and reluctant about activities at first (especially athletic activities), she's the one who gets most into it in the end like a child. At one point she forgets what day comes after which. Her sentences tend to completely contradict each other on a regular basis. She drinks 100% vitamin C drinks to "get smarter" despite it being completely sour (and not making her smarter). During one summer she nearly exploded herself with fireworks. She calls her unofficial pet cat of a few weeks "Kittymeow" of all things. And on occasion she just randomly yells out random sounds like, "kapow!" and "boom!" for no real reason. To everyone, Michiru is a bit of a simple person. Even the protagonist, Yuuji, has to determine her as a solid idiot after a lengthy period of observation.

But despite her silliness, Michiru is a main component of the group. She's the one who tries to get everyone involved, even in the unsociable Yumiko (leading to a bit of sparks between them). She's the one who covers for Sachi's errors so Sachi won't get upset and takes trouble off Amane's hands when her orders get messed up. Despite what a simpleton Michiru is, she is surprisingly thoughtful and considerate of others, though at the cost of neglect for her own well-being. But her kindness tends to go unseen, a behind the scenes deal, so most people don't notice... till she's gone.

Michiru may appear like your usual energetic ditz with a bit of bad luck, but in reality, that cheerful attitude is all a farce. The real Michiru is a subdued, depressed girl with a fatalistic attitude who believes she's equivalent to trash. In the first place, Michiru is a very innocent girl. But since she was young, she's been verbally and physically abused by the world around her. Her tutors called her worthless for not being able to learn fast enough, her parents struggled to love her after every failure she racks up. She couldn't even have her health, developing a heart disease early on in life. Back then, she felt so incompetent that only "breathing" was her sole talent in her opinion. So, she wanted to die. She could no longer comprehend the reason of her continued existence. When she finally found a first and best friend, she cheered up considerably. Her best friend was the first person to ever give her the time of day. But when her best friend committed suicide in front of her very eyes, that was the end of Michiru's hope for a better life. From that point on, Michiru could no longer look forward to the future. She became haunted by the past, overcome with fears and anxieties of losing those precious to her. She began to believe that there was no point in making a bond with someone; it'll always end in painful separation, and she'll be hurt. She can't enjoy happiness, because she dreads the eventual end of that happiness. Even her sort of pet cat "Kittymeow"... well, she admits it's not actually his name. She refuses to name him officially, because once she gets attached, he'll leave her. She's convinced of that.

There's another element to Michiru's story too. After her best friend died, Michiru had to get a heart transplant. In some mysterious way, the owner of her new heart came to co-exist inside Michiru's body. An alternate personality of sorts, but this "other Michiru" was a whole other person. In one body lie two souls. But to add more punches to Michiru's self-esteem, this "other Michiru" was much better at sports and could hold a decent conversation with others, where as the real Michiru was much weaker in those aspects. The "other Michiru" was better than her, better at her than anything. She was cheerful and smart; everybody liked her. Soon the "other Michiru" seemed like a more real Michiru than the actual Michiru to those around her. This greatly distressed Michiru, so much that her own existence felt even more meaningless than ever. She couldn't even win at being herself. In that case, she felt the other her should just replace her.

But then she learned something. She found a way to make herself feel useful to the world. If she could make people laugh by pretending to be silly, it would give her life a bit more meaning. It would give her a better sense of purpose. Like, at the very least, she could make someone smile in the end. So Michiru forces herself to act out. She plays up the part and reacts in the most convenient ways to entertain. The cheerful girl that people shake their heads at is really just trying to stay above the surface, while her real self sinks below.

But in moments of great emotional distress, her other self comes out. Her other self, seeking only to help Michiru in the best of intentions, tries to solve her problems neatly when she's unaware. What the real Michiru might recall as a conflict will suddenly be concluded without fuss when she wakes up. This phenomenon frightens Michiru, because she never can remember what happens when her other self takes over. There are gaps in her memory that she can't bring to mind, and she feels like she'll gradually stop being herself at this rate. Like, maybe someday she'll just disappear completely from this world.

◎ Powers/Abilities: Unless a power is being an incredibly poor actress, Michiru has none. She is the worst at athletics amongst her classmates, and her grades are... Well, they could always be better...
◎ Weapons & Other Special Inventory:

Shark pouch, containing her "ramune candy" and various other knick-knacks

Her school uniform

CEREALIA-Specific

◎ Element: Fire
◎ Sense: Touch. As Michiru isn't the brightest of bulbs, basic touch seems like something she'd know to trust best.
◎ Seven Character Traits:

+ Cheerful, thoughtful, funny
( Innocent )
- Incompetent, insecure, fear of loss